Top Definition
American martial artist, action star, and Hollywood actor who is best known for playing Cordell "Cord" Walker on Walker, Texas Ranger. Also an extremely overrated icon that has no real talent save for the ability to kick a 2X4. He is an extremely closeminded Fundamentalist Christian that tried to have the bible used as mandatory reading material in public schools. His recent popularity is the result of a website created that listed exaggerated claims about Chuck Norris' strength and intellect. In reality he is a washed up loser that can be seen acting horribly on Walker, Texas Ranger or on late night excercise equipment informercials.
"Chuck Norris is a total doucheball!!"

"Who gives a shit about Chuck Norris?"

"Chuck Norris sucks dick for cab fare and then walks home."
от Oliofreak 28 март 2008
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A less than hardcore actor who once starred in such shitty films as Sidekicks, Invasion USA and Missing in Action. He is most know for his ridiculous display of round house kicks and poor dialogue on the show Walker Texas Ranger.
>or<
A washed up actor who got his second wind based upon a very large list of (at one time) humorous jokes and facts(If you will) about him, that after being repeated from here to Nantucket far too many times, became old and played out and down right NOT FUNNY ANYMORE
Chuck Norris' tears cur-- oh wait, you've heard this one before? Yeah me too about a million times...
от Pamanda 25 февруари 2006
Some old dude. He sucks. aka Chuck Whoris.
I kicked Chuck Norris down the stairs and he broke a hip. Then, I beat him with his cane.
от Alyssa yo 13 февруари 2006
Texas Ranger who likes to pimp his home gym thingy. Throw him into any sentence involving celebrities and the sentence is instantly funny.
The best actors in the world are Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, and Chuck Norris.
от Friend with benefits 09 май 2005
One of the most overrated jerks to ever be loved by adolescents.

A third-rate martial artist (who was destroyed by Bruce Lee), Christian fundamentalist (wishes to have America become a puritanical christian theocracy), raging conservative, Total Gym spokesman, annoying white guy, and part of Sarah Palin's "real America".

Having been in plenty of movies (usually fighting red people, brown people, or yellow people) that have gained popularity amongst American youth, Chuck Norris was recently treated to a mock-godhood in the form of jokes. Being more commonly associated now with "pushing the earth down when doing push-ups" than his christian fundamentalism, Norris has been able to avoid falling into obscurity. Mike Huckabee, in an attempt to attract a younger, keener group of conservatives in his presidential bid, enlisted Chuck Norris in an ad campaign. Lacking any political substance, Huckabee would sit next to Chuck, raddle off a few Chuck jokes, broken up by Chuck Norris raddling off the old fashioned conservative campaign rhetoric, and ending with Chuck punching the air and saying "Chuck Norris Approved!" Huckabee lost steam early in the campaign, and Norris latched himself to McCain.

Norris has also worked with his wife to advertise efforts to begin teaching the bible in public schools across America. Believing that America is founded upon "Christian principles", he seems to have no problem reaching the conclusion that we should therefore essentially abandon democracy in every way but name and become a theocracy, with christian leaders, christian populace, and the bible as soul judgement of how to run the country. It is unknown, but doubtful, that Norris has read the entire bible.

Final note: His popularity has become so great amongst adolescent males and their middle-aged male teachers, that anyone who attempts to criticize him is bound for an ass-whooping (as I am sure to get after sending this in).
The Chuck Norris jokes I was bombarded with at school became so frustrating, I eventually launched a worldwide anti-Chuck Norris propoganda campaign.
от The Slime 27 юни 2009
1) A guy who everybody thinks is badass but is in reality a total pansy.

2) Despite being a big, burly guy, but killed by the comparatively scrawny Bruce Lee

3) Thinks that Barack Obama is not eligible to be President because he wasn't born in the U.S., despite the fact that thorough investigations have proven otherwise and that his mother was a U.S. citizen, making Obama a U.S. citizen by birth.

4) Endorsed Mike Huckabee, aka the GOP's answer to Jimmy Carter for President in '08
1) Joe: Chuck Norris' tears can cure cancer. Too bad he never cries.

Bob: You're wrong on both counts.

2) Bruce Lee: I KILL CHUCK NORRIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

3) Chuck Norris: Barack Obama was born in Kenya, and therefore can't be president.

Constitutional Expert: Contrary to popular belief, one doesn't have to be born in the United States to be eligible for the Presidency, only a citizen by birth. Even if he was born in Kenya, his mother was a U.S. citizen, making him one by birth.

4) Chuck Norris: Hi I'm Chuck Norris, and I'd like you to vote for Mike Huckabee for President in 2008.

Intellectual: If Mike Huckabee's our next president, we're screwed.
от thegreatrock 16 февруари 2010
A retarded fundamentalist Christian who thinks that the 2'000 year old piece of shit known as the Bible should be taught in school as fact. Oh, and he's a shit actor
Chuck Norris: Hi, I'm Chuck Norris.
Me: You fucking suck. *roundhouse kicks him in the balls*
от Someone With Common Sense 18 февруари 2012
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